Showing posts with label whimsical. Show all posts
Showing posts with label whimsical. Show all posts

Wednesday, 27 March 2013

Invest In The Eurozone?

While reading in the Telegraph a report of the inept performance that was England last night, one is amused by the adverts that appear underneath (pictured above)

One wonders if it's 5 days early, a Freudian slip by the pro-EU paper or the Telegraph's odd way of mocking the Cypriots?

Wednesday, 2 January 2013

Liar, Liar...

It's with a little amusement, considering my last post, I stumble upon this from CORDIS (Community Research and Development Information Service) courtesy of the EU Commission:
Liar, liar nose on fire

European researchers have made a major advance in thermal imaging techniques that is bringing to life an old fable. Everyone is familiar with the children's story of Pinocchio, a wooden puppet, with a nose that grew every time he told a lie. Now researchers from Spain are seeing parts of this tale ring true.

The researchers from the University of Granada, Department of Experimental Psychology have discovered that when a person lies he or she experiences what they have termed a 'Pinocchio effect'. During the Pinocchio effect the subject may experience an increase in the temperature around their nose and in the orbital muscle in the inner corner of their eyes. In addition to this, the researchers discovered that when people perform a considerable mental effort, temperature around the face drops, and when we have an anxiety attack our face temperature rises. These are some of the conclusions that were arrived at in their pioneering study and as a result of their new applications in the field of thermography.
Given that the Spanish University of Granada "in most cases [receives]funding from the European Union", via the European University Association, I'm sure we are all agreed that this research is a wonderful use of our money.

But more importantly what would Cameron or Health look like using thermal imaging techniques, one wonders whether it would need significant recalibration just to register an image, given that it would otherwise go off the scale.

Sunday, 30 December 2012

Quote Of The Day

From the Telegraph Editorial (my emphasis):
Already the bombardment has started: Herman Van Rompuy, the president of the Council of Europe, this week insisted that Britain must be either completely in, or completely out.
Erm... wrong Council, Van Rompuy is President of the European Council. The Council of Europe is not even an EU institution.

Sunday, 1 April 2012

Have Your Say And Make A Difference

Credit where credit's due, sometimes one has to acknowledge that occasionally the EU gets things completely right, and today against all the odds, contrary to all my expectations and constant criticisms, the EU has begun the much desired process of democratic reform, to the extent where it now leads the way on democracy.

As per the requirements of the Lisbon Treaty today is when the European Citizens’ Initiative comes into effect:
In accordance with the Regulation, it will only be possible to launch the first European Citizens' Initiatives from 1 April 2012.
Which allows:
....one million EU citizens to participate directly in the development of EU policies, by calling on the European Commission to make a legislative proposal.
Don't delay, you can find all the facts here, learn how to sign up here and follow the procedure here. We can all make a difference, all we need is enthusiasm. Please partake, together we can help make the EU a safer, happier and more prosperous place to live for everyone.

Update: and you know what? UKK41 agrees with me

Thursday, 3 November 2011

Confusion (2)

The Mail doesn't know its (stage) left from right (circled - click to enlarge):

Sunday, 29 May 2011

British Understatement

From Calling England:

It reminds me of the famous story from the Korean war where 600 British were under attack from 10,000 Chinese soldiers, and the British brigadier; Thomas Brodie reported to the American Commander that the situation was "a bit sticky, things are pretty sticky down there" i.e. hurry up with them reinforcements - now! Needless to say to the Americans the phrase; "a bit sticky" didn't quite have the same urgency.

Wednesday, 20 April 2011

To Celebrate The Royal Wedding


Skinner's Brewery have brought out a new beer in celebration of the big day on the 29th.

Friday, 1 April 2011

April Fool

Lots of the usual April foolery today in the MSM and on the blogs. One odd one though is this from The Sun:
COPS quizzed a boy of 13 over an "assault" on another lad - with a MARSHMALLOW.

Officers swooped on Nathan Watch's school in Torpoint, Cornwall, after a sweet thrown by larking kids hit the lad.

Nathan's dad Nigel called the probe "pathetic".

He told how he was called by the school to tell him his son was being accused of "common assault" - and would be quizzed as it had become a "police matter".
It must be a wind-up I thought, then doubts crept into my mind. No I could imagine that this would be true especially when other papers run with it, including the Daily Mail:

But they have now pulled their copy. Whoops have the Daily Mail been caught out? No apparently it still might be true.

Update: Sun says the story is true:
Our TRUE Page One story yesterday about a boy of 13 quizzed over an alleged assault with a marshmallow was listed in the Top Ten April Fools on America's Fox News.
Ridiculous

Tuesday, 29 March 2011

Don't Panic Mr Mainwaring, Don't Panic

A wonderful 'the world's going to end' headline from the Daily Mail today:

Radioactive particles are discovered in...wait for it...capital letters...Oxfordshire. Not only that but in the....sleepy village of Chilton.

Nothing to do with the fact that one of the UK's main atomic research centres is based just around the corner - a 1 minute's drive away - and has substantial radiation measuring facilities, which were used to inform the Government during the Chernobyl crisis.

Eg Hitler

I was searching the Daily Express website for an EU story, and the suggested option in the search field for typing in 'EU' came back with this (click to enlarge):

However other searches come up with different suggestions in 'search the Daily Express' field.

Monday, 28 March 2011

Still Second

Despite winning the Labour leadership, Ed Miliband still comes second to his brother, not only here, but...on Google results:

Monday, 28 February 2011

"Nobody Thinks In Terms Of Human Beings. Governments Don't"

This blog is taking a short sabbatical as I will be in Vienna for a few days. On that note, I'll leave you with the theme tune from one of the greatest British films ever.

e>

No doubt the EU will take credit for that even though it didn't even exist at the time it was made.

Friday, 25 February 2011

Not Available In English

I was digging around the Eur-Lex (access to EU law) site looking for accession treaties for a bit of research (as you do) and I find this:


The Accession Treaty for the UK (and Ireland) is the only one not available in English.

Wednesday, 16 February 2011

UK Refuses To Endorse EU Accounts

The Telegraph reports that:
The British Government has put the Commission "on notice" that the accounts, which have not been signed off by auditors for 16 years because of apparent inconsistencies, are unacceptable.
The UK Government follows where UKIP leads. However what's amusing is that the Telegraph accompany the story with the above picture, which rather mischievously shows anything but Mr Osborne standing up to the EU (it looks like he's being told off). The chap on the left is EU commissioner Ollie Rehn, who has form on expressing his views on democracy and adopting budgets.

Monday, 14 February 2011

Shocked


After the tragic and bizarre circumstances of two horses being electrocuted at Newbury racecourse, you would have thought that phrases like; 'spectators were shocked or stunned' would be avoided but oh no. The above is from the Telegraph.

This morning on BBC local news - South Today - a trainer said he was shocked by events, and Sky Sports News just now has interviewed the trainer, Nicky Henderson, of Kid Cassidy a horse that survived, who's just said he's stunned by what he saw. And a commentator on SkySports here says he was 'shocked' (1:25 mins in).

Saturday, 29 January 2011

The Offside Rule Explained...

...For Women:

Monday, 24 January 2011

Know Your Place

Sky Sports presenters Andy Gray and Richard Keys ignore a fundamental rule of broadcasting by failing to treat every microphone as a live one, and engage in off-the-air sexist comments about female assistant referees:



Personally I thought that not knowing the offside rule was a fundamental criteria of being an assistant ref anyway, or at least that's how it always seems in practice.

Saturday, 18 December 2010

Memorable Passwords

This letter in today's Telegraph amused me:

SIR – Learning that most passwords are easy to crack (report, December 15) made me realise that the two years of Army National Service I spent in Singapore and Malaya in the 1950s were not wasted.

My eight-digit Army number was burned on my brain and makes an ideal password which is impossible to break.

John Henesy
Maidenhead, Berkshire

Thanks John, we all now know that your password is 8 digits long and contains no letters (upper case or otherwise), that makes the task much easier (10 seconds apparently is all it takes). We also know your name, where you live, that you were in the Army, where you were and when. That can help us find out your password via other methods.

Impossible to break? I beg to differ.