Sunday, 22 April 2012

Beware Of The Leopard

As regular readers will be aware I'm currently in the process of moving house. This has meant I've had to tidy my current place up a little - basically finish off those little DIY jobs that I'd always intended to do but never got around to completing. And as I'm downsizing slightly a couple of trips to the local rubbish tip recycling centre is required.

Now what used to be sometime ago a relatively simple visit is no longer. No way. There are more signs telling you what you can't do than there are rubbish skips. Everything, but everything has to be sorted into the correct bin of which there are countless numbers of them; a process which means disposing of your rubbish takes many times longer and turns you effectively into an unpaid council worker - the length of time needed creating long queues of cars waiting to get in. The landfill skip is made as inconvenient as possible to get to - so much so they might as well have a 'beware of the leopard' sticker on it.

Knowing this, I thought I would be cunning (or so I thought) and turn up as soon as they open this morning when it wouldn't be busy. Now as it turned out that was a big mistake. Being the only car there, I was significantly outnumbered by copious numbers of chaps in hard hats and fluorescent uniforms manning each bin, one of whom took a great deal of interest in what I was disposing of. At first he wanted to inspect every black bag I had and 'helpfully' direct me to the correct bin...then we got to my old television:

He asks: "Have you cut the plug off? We can't accept it without the plug being cut off".

Me: "Er no I didn't know you had to. I don't have any wire cutters on me, do you have a pair I can borrow".

Him "No, you have to use your own. We won't accept it with a plug. What's that?" (pointing at something else in my car)

Me: "A couple of sheets of Plasterboard"

Him: "We can't take that, it's recyclable  and we don't have the bin for it and it can't go in landfill - you'll have to take it to [a centre that's 30 miles away]. What are those, are they car batteries?

Me: No, they're UPS ones.

Him: "You can't dispose of those here, we only accept car batteries, you'll have to go to [a different centre altogether which is 15 miles in the opposite direction]"

At this point I was very tempted to chuck him in the landfill skip. So more than half of my rubbish was refused and I was directed to go onto two different other places that are 45 miles apart. Lucky petrol is dead cheap these days isn't it?


  1. We have just the same nonsense at ours. They won't take used motor oil, the nearest alternative site approx 20 miles. Neither will they take hardcore, nearest site 20 miles a different way.

  2. Move to Yorkshire, my local takes everything and helps sort it out. Great guys...

  3. @Anon, trust Yorkshire to be helpful aka contrary :-) Marvelous